Is that I need them... and I need them to be in the very near future.

It's ironic that I'm writing about deadlines, because it's almost 1 a.m. here in Montgomery - roughly 5 or so hours before this blog is due to post. But in a way, that illustrates exactly what I have to say for myself... which is that I work best under a looming deadline. I'm not sure that my PRODUCT is always best when I'm down to the wire, but certainly I'm a better worker. (This blog may or may not be evidence of that fact.)

I'm writing this particular blog because (outside of this morning's blog due date) I have no pending deadlines. My theatre is on hiatus, the summer musical has just closed, and outside of a few special events and a yearly concert, August stretches out endlessly before me.

I HATE that.

In college, if I was stage managing or doing other areas, I was pretty on top of things. But when it came to my own field - sound - I was always finishing the design in the 11th hour. Part of this is because I'm a fabulous procrastinator. Part of this is because in college, I had a lot going on besides sound design. And part of it was because I was learning that was how I work best.

Although I can't say this style is necessarily healthy, it has served me well. My best case in point is my first summer here at ASF. We were still affiliated with the University of Alabama, and produced a production that served as the acting students final project. The MFA show on the docket that summer was Faustus. As the show was being conceptualized, the idea was to produce it as authentically Elizabethan as possible. With the exception of modern lighting (since we were in an indoor theatre) all of the other technical elements were going to be traditional. So, for sound - this meant a big ol' thunder sheet, crash box, live music, and a plethora of effect things done Foley. Little by little, this concept was abandoned, but for me, we went into tech with less than 10 prerecorded sound cues - including fade outs and the preshow announcement. Quickly we learned that as nice an idea as the concept was, it worked really poorly for sound with a modern audiences ears. Between first tech and second tech - luckily a dark day - I designed a complete show - 300 plus cues when it was all said and done. The only live elements that remained were a practical drum and a door knocker. I would never have been able to pull that off if I hadn't procrastinated in college, and work well under pressure. And in fact, it's one of the designs I'm most please with in my tenure at ASF.

The down side to this being my strong side, is that now - without being under the gun, without a looming deadline - I'm about as motivated as a road side armadillo.

Most of my coworkers LOVE this time of year for us. Indeed, we can put in fewer hours, there are fewer meetings, no employee schedules to worry over, the work days are lighter, everyone takes longer lunches, and many of us spend a lot of time conversing around the prop shop coffee pop. Other than the coffee chat and being able to take my vacation without worrying about the production system catastrophically failing mid show (which has happened when I was out of town for a weekend during performance) - I can't STAND this time. Sad. But it's true...

This dark block is perfect for projects long put off during regular season hours for lack of time versus production schedule. It's the time for maintenance, for cleaning, for planning what's coming up in the season. The last three are things I'll get around to doing, though I'll be very lack luster as I do them. I'll even get my books balanced, the scripts for next season read, my first cue plot and some preliminary music samples chosen for our season opener, and maybe even clean my desk. But forget the projects. As much as I hate to say it, without a "real" deadline or pressing need, I'm not going to get around to making improvements, solving issues, or even rearranging our FOH mix position.

I've tried imposing deadlines on myself. But that doesn't work. Frankly it tends to back fire - and instead of accomplishing more, I bull-headily accomplish less. I've even asked my coworkers to give me some deadlines. That works great if the project or work has to do with their area and I'm accountable to them. If it's all me... yeah... not so much.

I have to admit, I really cringed as I came to terms with this, because it felt like I wasn't "self-motivated." In some ways, I suppose that's true - but what I'm realizing is that it's about being busy working versus making busy work. I love being busy when the list is crucial to a show, or a production related project. Not being busy... frankly, I'd just assume stay home and sleep.